“I would NEVER have an abortion.”

I grew up in church and asked Jesus to be my Lord and Savior at five years old. I can remember that day like it was yesterday. My brother and sister were at school and I was home with my dad. I asked him if he would help me get saved. I cried and cried tears of joy after we prayed and I wanted to tell the world about Him.

I also grew up with a mother addicted to pain medication, so I was exposed to a lot of trauma for as long as I could remember. After living years and years with an addict, it took its toll on me as a young girl just trying to find her way. I became very angry with God and eventually fell away from Him after my dad was put in jail. He was trying to keep her from driving under the influence and wouldn’t give her the car keys. My mom called the cops and they believed she was a victim of domestic violence. This was not true. I witnessed the whole thing. This sealed the deal in my mind that I was done following a God who would take away the one parent who actually loved and protected me.

For years and years I compromised every value I used to hold dear. I found myself pregnant the summer before my senior year of college. While I had been running away from God for years, I could have never dreamed of having an abortion. I knew it was murder and I knew that it was a life. In fact, I grew up with an aunt who was tormented emotionally for years from participating in four abortions. I watched her involvement with pro-life ministries’ nearly my whole life. I saw the damage that abortion brings. I would NEVER have an abortion.

I was not prepared mentally or spiritually for what was about to happen to me. The person I was in a relationship with, the person I trusted, refused to have that baby. This stung, BAD. I was so close to my own father that it broke my heart to think I could have a child whose own father wanted nothing to do with them. But I still wanted to figure out how to have this baby. It became increasingly impossible as his family continued to pressure me into having an abortion. I felt alone. I felt helpless. I felt defeated. After his grandfather mailed him a check for the exact amount, I went numb. I knew it was happening and I gave up. I told him if he wanted it so bad, he would need to make all of the plans, take me there, and figure it all out on his own. He did. He dropped me off and told me not to look at the people on the sidewalk trying to persuade me there’s another way.

I took the pill. I got in the car, looked out the window in silence and for the first time felt I was living in a nightmare. I felt the weight that I was officially living hell on earth and I had made the biggest mistake of my life.

Not long after, I found my way back to God as I had hit my personal rock bottom. For five years, he would continue to refine me and set me back on a path to Him. I found myself again and it was in the arms of Jesus.

At this point, my aunt and grandmother had found an amazing ministry called Deeper Still. Every time I went home to California they would talk about what God was doing and their search for the right property to hold their own chapter. It would eat me alive listening to them and also make me so happy they found their calling. I knew I was forgiven by God, but there was no way I could admit to my family that I had an abortion too. I didn’t want to ruin the way they saw me. I couldn’t bear for them to know that after all of the years of them fighting against abortion, I went and made the same mistake.

But all glory to God, because He knew I was only operating in half the woman He created me to be. Before their first official retreat on the new property, my grandma’s knee had become injured. My dad was originally supposed to help her in the kitchen to serve the guests, but near last minute, some men decided to attend the retreat. This meant my dad needed to help the men’s team and that left my injured grandma alone in the kitchen. My aunt felt lead to ask me, mind you I live in Colorado out of state, if I would be interested in serving on the team in the kitchen. I can remember thinking how I had been praying for their ministry, but definitely not for myself to be there. But God knows us so well and He knew that to get me to that retreat, I’d have to think I was helping my grandma. I agreed because I wanted to obey what I felt was God’s calling. But in the coming days, I was sick to my stomach knowing I had this huge secret that no one knew about. I knew there was no way I could go serve at an ABORTION retreat, side by side with my family, when I couldn’t even say the word abortion out loud. I prayed and knew I needed to first call my dad, be honest, and let them decide. He then told me I needed to call and tell my aunt. I was so embarrassed, but I trusted God. She was gentle. She told me she thought I should attend the retreat, but that she needed to discuss it with the team because they were full. Even just simply telling the truth out loud to my family had lifted a weight. This was only the beginning.

It was decided I needed to first attend my own retreat before I could serve on the team. So what started with helping in the kitchen ended with the most healing experience of my life; a part from the day I asked Jesus to come into my heart.

What Jesus did for me at that retreat I’ll share on my next post. I’m so thankful for the redemptive work of the cross of Christ. I am a life changed through Him and His ministry through Deeper Still.

The Beginning of Knowledge

Proverbs 1:7 The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and discipline.

Towards the end of 2020, like most I’m sure, I felt a lot of weariness, and a lot of exhaustion. I grew very apathetic, to the point where not much seemed to bring me excitement or passion. I felt numb. This was not like me as God has placed a deep longing to learn, grow, and adventure within my heart. But the problem was, my heart wasn’t aligned… in HIM. My only resolution began to be to seek Him. He led me to read through the Bible in a year. If you have never done this before, I highly recommend it. God will grow you in ways you would never think possible. Just trust Him and He will see you through it.

There was a gentle leading to begin with Proverbs. It wasn’t audible, just a sense that the words in this book were exactly the prayers needed. I opened to chapter 1, asked the Lord to speak to me. After reading only five verses, I wrote in the margin, “Lord, help me to listen better and increase my learning of You!” which was inspired by verse 5 where it reads, “let a wise person listen and increase learning, and let a discerning person obtain guidance.” It was as if God was highlighting everything I was reading. What an amazing feeling when you intentionally go to the feet of Jesus EXPECANT to hear from Him and everything you read feels like a fountain of information and truth gushing out at you. You can’t get enough.

As I waded into Proverbs, I felt the nudge to sit and soak a while at Proverbs 1:7, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and discipline.” The word BEGINNING begged me to stop everything and dive deeper to get a closer look. I began praying, “Lord, teach me how to truly fear you, …what does that even mean really mean?” The Holy Spirit answered as new revelation came into view. The fear of the Lord is only the BEGINNING of knowledge!

My apathy began to drift away as a renewed passion washed over me like a gentle and cleansing wave. Suddenly, the desire to hear from God and explore new territory filled me with expectation in finding new treasures the Lord has hidden in the depths.

If fearing the Lord is only the beginning to knowledge, can we imagine the treasures we will find as we seek Him?

This thought of fearing the Lord consumed me. I continued to press in and ask what it actually meant to “fear the Lord”. And just as I had suspected in early January, if I wanted to hear Him speak, I had to ask the Author Himself in His word… and He spoke. Plain as day, in Proverbs 8:13 CSB, there it was; an answer to an unresolved question that had been stirring for so long in my heart. “To fear the Lord is to hate evil. I hate arrogant pride, evil conduct, and perverse speech.” My heart soared as I soaked in this truth.

When we seek, He promises we will find.

So with this new knowledge revealed, I feel called to examine my own heart, my own fear of the Lord, and press into His word now more than ever.

Would you join me? This is only the beginning.

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank you for stirring up questions in our hearts so that we would come humbly before you for answers. Thank you for revealing your treasures to us and allowing us to join you in this adventure you’ve created. I pray that we would fear you, that we would hate evil, and pursue You. I pray for hearts that would yearn to grow closer to you and to know you deeper. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.

Held in the New Year

“Just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself.” Ephesians 1:4

The time had finally come … 6:00 PM. The occasion I embarrassingly longed for most of the day due to lack of energy … Baby’s BEDTIME. God Himself has blessed me with one of the sweetest human beings on this planet, but today, Mama was tired. My husband and I did our normal nightly routine with her; change her diaper, fill up her humidifier, brush the two teeth, and prayers to Jesus. By this time, she is usually getting the rest of her wiggles out as I begin to lay her in the crib. Tonight was different. Tonight, instead of wiggles, I was welcomed with snuggles. And I’m talking, calm, nestled in your neck – baby snuggles. I felt an intense wave of calm come over me as I spoke words from my heart straight into her little ear. As I held her against my chest, I was overwhelmed with intense love and a sneak peak into the powerful type of love our Father, God in Heaven, must feel about us; His children.

I often liken being a parent to walking around with your heart outside of your chest (as I’m sure many others do). In this moment, holding my one-year-old daughter, I couldn’t help but see a glimpse of His heart for us. We run around in our daily lives, busy and usually with lists and lists of things we “need” to do. Running around like wiggly toddlers who can’t seem to sit still long enough to get into the presence of a holy and loving Father. The Father who just wants to hug us so tight, arms wrapped – heart to heart, whispering His love for us into our little ears.

Held. Deeply loved.

Ephesians 1:4 tells us, just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself, (Emphasis Added). This just blows my mind. He CHOSE us before the foundation of the world, He PREDESTINED US TO ADOPTION. He LOVES us with a FATHER’S love. Not as a distant creator. But here. Immanuel…God with us.

I am so thankful for His grace and that unlike my own imperfections and shortcomings as a parent, He has none. Jesus Christ is never tired, wishing it were our bedtime so He could finally rest. The Holy Spirit is always there, praying and working on our behalf (Romans 8:26).

As we draw near the end of 2020, our eyes closed on a year past as we snuggle into the new year, may we humble ourselves like children (Matthew 18:4) and wrap our arms around our Father. His arms are ready and willing to embrace his precious children with a love so deep, nothing on this earth can compare.

Dear Heavenly Father, Thank you for choosing us to be your children. Thank you for saving us from sin and death and welcoming us into your family, to live with you for all of eternity. Thank you for sending your Holy Spirit to dwell within us, to pray for us and to lead us. Lord, please help us to crave a deep and personal relationship with you and if there are any who are reading this that ache at the thought of a loving father, please restore their hearts. Please help them to see you with Heavenly perspective, untainted by the sins of the world; a perfect love. I pray all of this in Jesus’ precious name, Amen.

Heavenly Perspective

There was a tug of war going on in my soul the morning after the election. I woke up and knew I needed to pray before checking my phone to see the “results”. I tried to go about my normal routine before I went ahead and looked up the decision of the American people. Much to, I’m sure, everyone’s chagrin, still no certainty on who would be the next President. I could feel literal heaviness begin to overwhelm me as I sat in the uncertainty of an earthly circumstance. My mind began to wander over many scenarios that could occur, regardless of who wins.

I decided to take a walk. I took my dogs and walked down to the lake nearby. My plan was to put on worship music and walk away my anxiety. God had other plans. I have felt a bit of a dry spell when it comes to writing and hearing from God. In all honesty, it’s because I had been looking down. I realized it when I noticed the reflection of trees in the water. I heard the word perspective.

I had been looking down at the reflection of these trees in the water; but when I actually looked up, I saw the trees for what they actually are, upright, and not upside down. I continued to hear in my mind, “set your sights on things above” over and over again. So I found a rock nearby on a small hill and began to read Colossians chapter 3, where that verse lives. 

3 Since you have been raised to new life with Christ, set your sights on the realities of heaven, where Christ sits in the place of honor at God’s right hand. ² Think about the things of heaven, not the things of earth. ³ For you died to this life, and your real life is hidden with Christ in God (Emphasis Added). In that short moment, I realized I had been saying with my voice that I trusted God. Yet, I was walking around with the heaviness of the world. I was looking at everything upside down. I feared man and placed my hope in earthly things, rather than setting my sights upward to Heaven on the REALITIES:

The reality that earthly positions change constantly and Christ’s position at the right hand of God does not.

The reality that His position was sealed when Jesus Christ was crucified for the sins of the world.

The reality that Jesus Christ rose to NEW LIFE three days later. The reality that He is preparing a place for us and WILL return for HIS children.

The earth will look upside when the only way we look at it is from an earthly perspective. When we set our sights on heaven and see the earth from its rightful perspective, only then are we are able to see that Christ is still in control. God does not change based on our earthly conditions.

Let us set our sights on HEAVEN, the true reality. Not on the things of a fleeting and dying world. We will always fall short, be disappointed, and left with a void when we try to fill our purpose with the things of this world. But, when we set our sights on the things above, we will be filled with love, mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience (Colossians 3:12), all things a broken and decaying world needs.

Dear Heavenly Father, Please help me to posture my sights upward to you, on the realities of Heaven. Please forgive me for looking down and for losing YOUR perspective. Please help us all to quit looking down at earthly troubles, and to instead look up towards Heaven and the reality of who YOU are. Please help us to be loving, merciful, kind, humble, gentle, and patient so that others can see you in our actions. Please bring more people into your family so that they will also spend eternally with their creator and Heavenly Father. We love you and we trust you. In Jesus Christ’s saving name I pray, Amen.

Today’s post was written by Traci Young, who is a contributor for the Deeper Still Devotional Blog. Traci calls Broomfield, Colorado home, and loves spending quality time with her husband, baby girl, and two red doodles.  She left the workforce to become a stay at home mom and sees it as her mission field! Traci serves on the Fallbrook, CA Deeper Still team.

Deeper Still is a ministry that offers free weekend retreats for women who have had abortions and the men who fathered children lost to abortion. If you have had an abortion and would like more information about our retreats, please go to www.GoDeeperStill.org to find a retreat close to you.

From Shame to Glory

“So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.” John 8:36

“They’ll know,” she thought quietly near the back.

“It’s probably written all over my face: Liar, hypocrite, selfish.”

“As long as I stay in the back and close to the exit, I’ll be able to hear the word of God, and not risk anyone learning the truth about me. It’s better this way.”

“I gave my voice up the day I swallowed that pill. If I proclaim to be a Christian and stand up for truth and goodness, I’ll only be seen as a hypocrite.”

“If they only knew…” She ached inside as she tried listening to the sermon. She could hardly hear anything besides the many thoughts flooding her heart and mind.
These were just a few of the lies whispered to me by the enemy.

I believed my Savior forgave me with every fiber of my being. He was changing my life, healing and renewing my heart. However, even though I knew I was forgiven, I could not hear the word abortion without recoiling in my skin, feeling sick to my stomach, and wanting to run toward the nearest exit. Nothing in that sounds healed to me; triggered – but not healed. I was afraid to get too close to anyone at church, or any person for that matter. I believed that if anyone knew the real me, they would reject me.  For a while, I allowed people in from a distance.  For five long years I lived half alive; forgiven yet hiding in shame.

Then, as the Lord would have it, I was given an opportunity to serve at a Deeper Still retreat, helping cook meals for the guests. My aunt was the one who invited me to serve. For years I wanted to stop hiding and tell the people I loved about my abortion. But something in my mind always convinced me to stay silent. When my aunt asked to serve, I knew that God was telling me it was TIME- it was time to share my secret.

God instilled on my heart that if I was going to help at a retreat, I could not risk my family finding out while we were there, it would take the focus off of the guests and onto me. I called my dad and then my aunt. Both my dad and aunt were so gracious. They told me I needed to go as a guest and not to serve. I thought I was forgiven and didn’t need to attend… but boy was I wrong!

I love how God works. I thought I would be serving God’s kingdom by cooking meals, but He had mightier plans. He knows us so well. He knew I didn’t think I needed any more healing and that the only way to get me to a mostly family lead retreat would be if they asked first!

At the Deeper Still Retreat, the Lord brought healing on more levels than I even knew existed within my heart and soul. Not only did God forgive me, He revealed that He never intended for my voice to be silent and hidden. God used Deeper Still to give me my voice back. Instead of shame, I saw a testimony.

My eyes began to open to the hurting. I realized that if I had been hiding in shame for years, how many others were doing the same exact thing? How many others were also afraid to be viewed as frauds? Instead of hiding in shame and fear, He encouraged me to speak up. No more whispers, no more secrecy, no more fear.

And the lies that once silenced me, now were turned into opposite proclamations of truth!

“They’ll know HIM,” she proclaimed!

“It’s written all over my face: Forgiven, Loved, FREE IN CHRIST!”

 “I will no longer stay in the back, close to the exit, because I cannot risk anyone not learning the truth about Jesus Christ!”

“I gave my voice to CHRIST the night I asked for His forgiveness. I will proclaim to be a Christian and stand up for truth and goodness! I am not hypocrite.”

“If they only knew…” She ached inside, wanting others to know Jesus is ready to release them from their own bondage.

Dear Heavenly Father, Thank you for rescuing us from deaths grip. Thank you for dying on the cross for our sins and making a way for us to come to you – through believing in your son, Jesus. I pray for the ones hiding in plain sight, living in bondage to a lie that they are too shameful, too far gone, too damaged. I pray in Jesus name they would leave those worries at the foot of your cross and ask you into their hearts, if they have not done so already. I ask that you would give us godly courage to speak your truth to the ones in our lives. I pray your mercy and truth over us all and thank you for redemption. Thank you for healing. It is in Jesus’ holy name I pray… Amen.

Today’s post was written by Traci Young, who is a contributor for the Deeper Still Devotional Blog. Traci calls Broomfield, Colorado home, and loves spending quality time with her husband, baby girl, and two red doodles.  She left the workforce to become a stay at home mom and sees it as her mission field! Traci serves on the Fallbrook, CA Deeper Still team.

Deeper Still is a ministry that offers free weekend retreats for women who have had abortions and the men who fathered children lost to abortion. If you have had an abortion and would like more information about our retreats, please go to www.GoDeeperStill.org to find a retreat close to you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wonderfully Complex and Fully Known

Psalm 139:14 (NLT)
Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it. 

Last night, as my husband and I prayed with our sweet baby girl before bed, I couldn’t shake this overwhelming feeling of love and worry. Thankfully, I had just come from a church gathering. Our pastor shared a sermon about the importance of rest. He explained how we take on burdens and carry weight never meant to be ours. I immediately thought about my daughter. While I have been entrusted to be her mother, in truth, she doesn’t belong to me; she belongs to Jesus Christ.

Looking down at the most precious face I’d ever seen, I prayed that my daughter would not just know but believe she was fearfully and wonderfully made; knit together in my womb. I prayed she would trust that God knew her, loved her, and had a purpose for her long before any of us even knew she existed. I asked Him to take away my worry, to trust Him with her life. I needed to hear that sermon earlier. I needed to rest in Him. I was reminded that while it is our responsibility as parents to raise her in Christ – she is first and foremost a child of God. He loves her more than we can even fathom… So much peace follows when we humbly obey and release our cares and worries to Him.

After we kissed our daughter goodnight and laid her down, I turned on my phone and caught up on a daily devotional I have been doing with a younger cousin of mine. The study was on identity and knowing who we are and most importantly WHOSE we are. The whole day was centered on our being created as God’s masterpiece, created anew in Christ Jesus (Ephesians 2:10). It was exactly what I needed to read and hear.

Don’t you just love when He affirms your thoughts by giving you scripture to match what you were thinking and feeling? I sure do, because the following verses that came in the study sealed my prayers from earlier that evening with my daughter:

Psalm 139:13-16  (NLT)
¹³ You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body
and knit me together in my mother’s womb.
¹⁴ Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!
Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.
¹⁵ You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,
as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.
¹⁶ You saw me before I was born.
Every day of my life was recorded in your book.
Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.

I was convicted that while I have had absolutely no problem seeing my daughter in the verses above, I did not believe them for myself. I, too, was knit together in my mother’s womb, made wonderfully complex, and KNOWN before I was born; and I needed to have the confidence that my life is also recorded in His book. If I were to ever raise a girl to believe these truths, I needed to first believe them over my own life.

I’m so grateful our God is near; we just need to show up. I have been wrestling with Him for a while in regards to learning how to be a mother in His image and not of the world. I believe He has me starting at square one; believing, not just knowing, I am fearfully and wonderfully made, just like my daughter is.

My daughter is seven months old, she watches me. She will continue to look to me for affirmations, lessons, and love. I want her to know who she truly is in Christ. When she watches me, I want her to see her Mom living out God’s truth; a girl like her, made wonderfully complex and fully known by her creator!

Thank you dear Lord for conviction! Thank you for placing in my heart the desire to know you deeper and to know who I am in you. Thank you for the gift of children, no matter how they are placed in our lives. Lord, I pray that you would show us all how to be stewards of your gift of life. I thank you that you are never finished with us, that you are always with us. I pray that you would use us to rise up a new generation rooted in you. Thank you for being there to take all of our worries and cares because you care for us! It is in Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.

Today’s post was written by Traci Young, who is a contributor for the Deeper Still Devotional Blog. Traci calls Broomfield, Colorado home, and loves spending quality time with her husband, baby girl, and two red doodles.  She left the workforce to become a stay at home mom and sees it as her mission field! Traci serves on the Fallbrook, CA Deeper Still team.

Deeper Still is a ministry that offers free weekend retreats for women who have had abortions and the men who fathered children lost to abortion. If you have had an abortion and would like more information about our retreats, please go to www.GoDeeperStill.org to find a retreat close to you.

 

 

Healing the Mother Wound

1 Peter 2:4 (NLT)
He personally carried our sins in his body on the cross so that we can be dead to sin and live for what is right. By his wounds you are healed.

We all have wounds. For me it was a mother’s wound, one that cut very deep. In hopes of filling the Mom-shaped void, I looked for love and validation in places I had no business exploring. I had no idea that the same void I was desperately trying to fill could only be satisfied by Jesus Christ himself. I had no idea that the same grace I had been searching for my whole life, was the exact same my own mother needed.

One particular occasion came to mind when I began to see my own mother in a different light. When the Lord revealed that while she was wounded, her God-given mothering heart was still trying to function …

It was a dark and chilly January evening, somewhere in the early 2000’s. I found myself coming home from hanging out with my childhood friend. I remember walking through the front door, and wondering if any of my family really cared it was still my birthday. The front entryway was dark, with only a distant light from the connected kitchen and family room nearby. The conversational sounds from my siblings and Dad filled the air with a familiar and typical evening. I walked into the kitchen and found her on the floor, again, those same dull dark brown eyes looking up, staring deep into mine, almost as if to say “I’m sorry I hurt you again”. Her movement slow and uncoordinated, she tried to lift herself up, with little success. I watched as she fumbled around the appliances and tried to lift her heavy body onto her feet. She eventually did. She slurred her words as she pointed slowly, with what could be construed as a faint smile, to the debris of cake batter and frosting. In both my favorite color and flavor. Pink and Strawberry. She remembered my birthday.
…
Growing up, I can’t remember a long period of time where my mother was sober. I was born into what felt like insecurity and chaos. I didn’t know any better. My normal looked like a lot of good mixed with a whole lot of scary. As a child, I never understood why she would choose drugs over her own family. I couldn’t understand why we weren’t enough for her, why I wasn’t enough for her? That question would haunt me for many years as I began to create my own wounds I never thought would heal.

But the fascinating part about wounds is: if you take care of them, eventually they will heal. They may even turn into scars if they’re deep enough. But scars can be some of the most powerful reminders of lessons we have learned in life.

The most powerful scars of all are displayed on the hands and feet of Jesus Christ, what a beautiful thought. Reminders that while we were yet sinners Christ died for us (Romans 5:8)! The pain, suffering, and death that brought scars to our Lord are now eternal reminders of how much He loves us; of our eternal hope if we put our trust in Him.

When I stopped running away from Him and truly surrendered my life to Jesus Christ, He valiantly rescued me and set me free from all of my harbored guilt, shame, and fear of abandonment. He took me by the hand and walked me out of a serious pit of deception and misery. He took my open mother wound, sealed it with his blood, and made a beautiful scar. This scar no longer reminds me of what I lack, it reminds me of hope in a broken world. It reminds me that once I was lost, but now I am FOUND.

When Jesus heals, I believe He also reveals. What He revealed to me was a woman hurting. A woman damaged from her own wounds. A woman needing forgiveness, hope, and healing.

He showed me my own mother. A mother who, despite her own wounds and shortcomings, remembered her daughter’s birthday and wanted to make her feel special.

There isn’t a soul on earth too broken to receive Christ’s mercy and grace; Or a wound too deep to feel the healing power of the Holy Spirit.

He is waiting for you to call on Him to be your Lord and Savior; Our God, “who wants everyone to be saved and to understand the truth.” 1 Timothy 2:4

If you would, please pray with me as I ask our loving Father to heal and bind up our wounds in Jesus’ name!

My Dearest Heavenly Father,
Thank you for Your saving grace and that through Your son, Jesus Christ, we may come BOLDLY to YOU! Lord, there are wounds so deep, especially this time of year during Mother’s Day. I pray that You would restore these precious hearts and let them know their true worth and purpose is found in the comfort and love of Jesus Christ. I pray we would all seek our validation and worth in who You say we are, and not who the world says we should be. I pray for a peace that would surpass ALL understanding this year on Mother’s Day and that we would all feel a hug from our Heavenly Father. Please teach us how to love, and how to Mother the way you designed us. It’s in your precious name I pray, Amen.

Today’s post was written by Traci Young, who is a contributor for the Deeper Still Devotional Blog. Traci calls Broomfield, Colorado home, and loves spending quality time with her husband, baby girl, and two red doodles.  She left the workforce to become a stay at home mom and sees it as her mission field! Traci serves on the Fallbrook, CA Deeper Still team.

Deeper Still is a ministry that offers free weekend retreats for women who have had abortions and the men who fathered children lost to abortion. If you have had an abortion and would like more information about our retreats, please go to www.GoDeeperStill.org to find a retreat close to you.